Dr. Matthew Paldy, PhD, LP

Licensed Psychoanalyst in NYC

Life's Continual Cycle of Fortune and Setbacks

There is an ancient Chinese parable about a man who lost his horse. When his neighbors heard the news, they went to console him, but he remained calm. “We'll see how it turns out,” he said. A few days later, the horse returned, bringing two wild horses with it. Now he had three horses. When the neighbors heard this, they came to congratulate him, but again he replied, “We'll see.”

Later that month, the man broke his leg while riding one of the horses. When his neighbors came to sympathize, he remained composed. “We'll see how it turns out,” he said. A week later, the emperor conscripted all able-bodied men in the village to fight a new war, but because of his injured leg, the man was spared. When the neighbors came to commiserate, he simply said, “We'll see how it turns out.”

— Ancient Chinese Parable

The Domain of Control

The parable illustrates that life is a continuous cycle of fortune and setback. Whether we experience a “good” or “bad” event often depends on how we interpret it—and that perspective is entirely within our domain of control. By consciously choosing how to narrate our experience, we exert surprising influence over the story of our lives.